Is your life going the way you’ve always wanted? If you’re like most of us, the answer is ‘no.’ While I’ve had a fairly good life, I’ve also weathered many storms. I’ve dealt with a lot of crap, sometimes the same crap over and over with escalating consequences until I finally learned the lessons.
I’ve maintained a comfortably uncomfortable existence for prolonged periods of time until I couldn’t take it anymore. I knew something had to change.
I usually started by believing that things around me had to change in order for me to be happy. That old “I’ll be happy when…” that never comes. I pushed and forced and tried to control everything and everyone around me making myself and everyone around me more angry, frustrated and resentful.
After some time, in each situation, I would finally run out of energy and do what felt like giving up. I would start to focus on something else or just coast for a little while to regain my strength. And that’s usually when the magic happened. Things would generally move in the direction I wanted when I stopped trying to control, when I stopped resisting the way things were.
Everything meaningful starts with a baby step. Usually, the first baby step is noticing what’s going on with yourself today. Right now. Noticing:
- What, how and when you eat (this affects a lot more than your waistline)
- How you hold yourself
- How much tension is in various parts of your body right now (face, neck, jaw, shoulders, arms, back and legs)
- How you spend your valuable time (something you can never get back)
- Your thoughts at any given moment
- Your emotions right now
The next step is to think about where you want to go, your goals. Think about them in very specific terms. What will your life be like on a day-to-day basis when you have achieved these goals?
- What time will you get up?
- What will you have for breakfast?
- Who will be there with you?
- What will you do each day?
- Where will you live?
- How will you dress?
- What will you eat and drink throughout the day?
- What kinds of exercise will you enjoy?
- How will you respond to the various people and situations in your day?
Now think of one small step you can take today, maybe right now. What is one thing you can easily do toward your goal?
- Clean the junk food out of your pantry.
- Choose water instead of a soda.
- Sign up for an exercise class or call to get more information.
- Take a half of a second to think before responding to someone the same old way.
- Take a walk at lunch.
- Google a topic you’ve always wanted to learn more about.
- Forgive yourself and/or someone else in your life.
- Read one chapter of a book you’ve been meaning to get to.
Write out a list of more baby steps you can take later today, tomorrow, the next day and each day for the rest of your life. Like the saying goes, “Life is a journey, not a destination.”
Notice how you feel as you take each step.
Notice how your life is changing for the better.
Find other people who want to join you on your journey. Yes, they’re out there.
My goal is to support you every step of the way, providing ideas and encouragement for you to live the life you’ve always wanted.
Just like babies taking their first steps, sometimes we need some help and sometimes we fall down. Just like a baby does, get up and keep trying until you’ve mastered that step. We’ve all been there before and know how hard it can be. The most important step is to decide to take that first step.
Don’t get upset if you deviate from your intended destination. Sometimes diversions lead to more exciting places and experiences. Sometimes plans change. Be flexible. Be open to new experiences. And tell me all about them!
Congratulations on taking your first baby step today!