Over the past few months, I’ve felt stuck.
As some of you recall, I abruptly lost my job in August. I’ve been using all that I know about manifesting and the Law of Attraction to create my next opportunity, knowing that something awesome was waiting for me.
I’ve seen how quickly these things can work and have felt frustrated that nothing was happening for me.
No matter what I did, I was hitting brick walls.
I looked deep inside myself and knew that I didn’t have fears of failure or success or the usual blocks that keep us from reaching our potential. I knew there was something inside me holding me back but couldn’t figure it out.
Until now.
Heeding the Call
The Universe told me in no uncertain terms to pull it off the shelf, dust it off and start listening. Forget about the other dozen audios I’ve downloaded recently.
Have I mentioned how you should always heed those calls from the Universe, aka your True Self?
Earlier this week I was driving around running errands as I was listening to the program. At the end of each tape, Tony has an exercise for you to do. As we all know, programs are of little value if you don’t follow the exercises and implement them into your life.
The exercise on the tape I was listening to called to me. I pulled over to write it down and start thinking about it. At first, I thought I would do the exercise when I got home. My True Self reminded me that it’s craziness with the kids when I get home. I thought I would do it after the kids went to bed but I’m frequently very tired by then.
Knowing how important this exercise could be, I pulled into a Starbucks and, mango smoothie in hand, started doing the exercise. The words and ideas flowed out of me.
My Life Will Never Be the Same
When I was done and read and absorbed all I had written, I felt a huge shift. From the deepest part of my core, I felt that I had finally put my finger on what was holding me back. I had this amazing feeling of positive energy running throughout my body.
I knew that nothing would be the same from that point on.
When I got home there were three voice messages from recruiters who wanted to speak further with me. The next day I received an email from another company to set up an interview. The following day I received another call from a different recruiter.
I had unlocked the block inside myself and almost instantly the results changed. Weird but true.
I’m very happy to report that the interview I had yesterday ended with an offer before I even got home. And when I got home I had another email from an HR director wanting to set up a phone interview and someone on elance.com specifically asking me to bid on their project.
So what happened? What kind of revelation did I experience when Tony Robbins joined me at Starbucks? (By the way, Tony has lots of great free resources on this page.)
Our Lizard Brains Do Strange Things
His exercise got me to see that I had falsely believed that someone close to me would judge me harshly for being successful again. Many years ago I had experienced anger and resentment from this person when I was at a job I loved, making some really good money. The anger and resentment didn’t come from my job or income. It came from how my completely un-enlightened self treated that person at the time (not well at all).
I saw how my subconscious mind was scared of re-creating old conflicts, despite the fact that everyone involved in those old conflicts has experienced some serious personal growth. All the circumstances have changed but my lizard brain was trying to protect me in its own primitive way.
Once I saw these false perceptions and shined some very bright lights on them, they disappeared. I could feel the difference. I could feel the weight lifted.
Instead of wanting changes in my life very badly but feeling held back from achieving them somehow, I felt a huge surge of positive energy around them. Sitting there at Starbucks by myself, I couldn’t help but smile a great, big smile.
I knew my life was about to change in a big way.
At this point, you’re probably asking what the heck the exercise was that caused such a huge shift. Here it is:
Simple Steps
- Write down four actions that you’ve been wanting to take but have felt held back – things you’ve been procrastinating on, things you feel you should do but just can’t make them happen. Then, for each action, write the following:
- All the pain you associate with taking that action. This could be the time it might take, how you think others will respond, how it might shake up your life or comfort zone. Write down everything you can think of then pause and think even more deeply. How does that feel to you?
- All the pleasure you’ve gotten from not following through or taking action. Regardless of how warped it may sound, there’s a payoff for us for doing or not doing things in our lives that are in our best interest. Don’t judge yourself here. Just get it all out.
- What will it cost you if you don’t take this action? What will your life look like in two, five or ten years if you don’t change or take this action? What will it do to your self-image, self-esteem, relationships, money? Feel this pain deeply.
- What will you gain by taking this action? How will your life be better? Think about the impact this action will have on every aspect of your life. How does all that feel to you?
Being the analytical person that I am, I drew a table on a blank piece of paper and labeled the columns: Action, Pain from Taking Action, Pleasure from No Change, Pain from No Change, Pleasure from Taking Action.
Two other critical aspects of this exercise are:
- If you really want to make the change you’re talking about, it has to be a MUST for you. You have to create emotional leverage for yourself.
- As you uncover limiting thoughts, beliefs and associations, you need to interrupt them and break the connections. Then you need to create new, positive associations.
For example, when I saw and felt the old association of doing well at work and being judged negatively, I saw its absurdity compared to the current situation. I created a picture of the old belief and literally exploded it. I saw and felt it blown to smithereens. And, as soon as I experienced that explosion, I associated the change I wanted to make with all the wonderful things that will happen and all the great feelings I associate with those wonderful things.
Now, when I think about the changes I want (like finding an awesome job I love, where I’m making a lot of contribution and being paid well), I feel how easy it is. I see and feel all the happiness and benefits it brings into my life. Simply stated, when I think of the change, I feel great at my core. The “yeah, but’s” and hesitations and tightness are all gone.
Try this exercise for yourself. Go deep. Go past the limits you’ve put on yourself in the past on what you’ll allow yourself to think about and feel.
True change comes from shining a light on those scary fears and watching them melt away.
I know you can do this! Tell me all about your experiences and results in the comments below!