As mindfulness becomes more mainstream, many people still wonder what it is and how to do it.
Mindfulness is simply being present to whatever is in your life in the moment and noticing it without judgment. While being present is certainly a challenge with all the constant distractions around you, tugging for your attention, the ‘without judgment’ part is equally as challenging.
Judging doesn’t only mean negative connotations. It means labeling of any kind. Good or bad, happy or sad, loving or fearful.
How Do You Practice Mindfulness?
Is it like meditating? Do I need anything to make me mindful?
You can be caught up in your busyness and stress then notice that you’re caught up. Without putting yourself down (labeling), you can accept it and ask, “What am I going to do about it?” Maybe close your eyes and take a deep breath. Maybe take a walk and come back to your work more centered. Maybe you remain in your busyness.
The difference with mindfulness is that each choice is a conscious one. You don’t mindlessly react. You make a mindful choice.
Mindfulness can also help you to understand why you do what you do. If you’re trying to change a habit, mindfulness is key. You can’t change what you don’t notice.
With mindfulness, you can pause to notice how you feel, what you’ve been experiencing lately, your energy level, your emotions, your thoughts. You can stop to see how all of that feeds the habit you’re trying to change. It can be almost impossible to change a habit if you don’t understand and change your triggers for the habit.
Without a mindful pause, you don’t give yourself the opportunity to make a different choice. You simply react.
A Daily Practice
Mindfulness isn’t like a lightbulb that you suddenly turn on and your life changes. It’s a daily practice, like gratitude, that doesn’t seem to do much at first. But, if you stick with it on a regular basis, you’ll realize one day how far you’ve come, how much your life has changed for the better.
Mindfulness has changed every aspect of my life: my health, relationships, finances, lifestyle and more.
Being more mindful of what I eat, when and where I eat it, how much, how it tastes, how it makes me feel afterward helps me to make small adjustments that have allowed my body, mind and emotional state to become healthier and happier.
Being more mindful of what I say and do with others has improved my relationships. When I got tired of repeating the same arguments with my husband, I used the power of the pause and mindfulness to experiment and find new ways of interacting. I consciously made different choices, sticking with what worked and dumping what didn’t. My husband and I can now communicate (and disagree) in a much more effective way that ultimately leads to a great outcome instead of the old dead end.
Being more mindful of how and when I spend money has helped me to stop spending that was more compensatory and focus on spending in alignment with my values. I need much less stuff than I used to think. My gratitude practice reminds me that I have quite enough, all of which I’m grateful for.
Being more mindful of my lifestyle choices has helped me to question common societal beliefs that simply don’t work for me or my family. We make choices based on our values and what’s important to us, not what “everyone” does. Our “alternative” lifestyle is perfect for us.
The Magic of Acceptance
Over time, being present to what is without judging it can lead to acceptance of what is without resisting it.
We all want people to act a certain way. We want things to go our way. We think we can control so much more than we actually can. When things don’t go our way, we resist the way things are going. We waste a lot of energy pushing and prodding, trying to control what we can’t control, resisting.
What you resist persists.
Rather than resisting what’s already happening, you can accept what’s happening, and ask yourself (the only thing you can control), “What am I going to do about it?” What can you do that’s within your control? Remember that other people are not in your control.
Accepting doesn’t mean being a doormat. It means taking responsibility for your thoughts and actions given what’s already present.
Acceptance is empowering. It removes the blaming and shifting of responsibility that makes it impossible for you to do anything about the situation.
With acceptance, you take responsibility for what you’ll do next to address the situation. It takes you out of the stewing and brooding and into action that can make a difference.
Sharing Mindfulness – My Books & Top Resources
While the law of attraction has certainly been sensationalized over the years, it’s a timeless law that can be used to create the life you want. Using the principles of mindfulness to better understand where you’re focusing your energy, you can use the law of attraction to bring more of what you want into your life.
In my latest book, The Mindful Guide to the Law of Attraction, I explain the aspects of mindfulness and the concepts behind the law of attraction, removing any sense of “woo woo,” and presenting it all in a practical framework that can be used by anyone to improve their life.
The book includes a collection of 45 meditations that help you get clear on what you want, ensuring that your energies are focused on what is right for you so you can attract more of what you want into your life.
The biggest secret I have learned throughout my own personal development journey is that the power to change our outcomes, to find a sense of inner peace, is inside of us right now. My goal in writing this book is to give you the tools to shine a light on what has been hidden inside you, so that you can achieve what you have been seeking. The meditations ground the tough work of your inner practice, and in the end, help you experience new realities in health, wealth, and matters of the heart. You can initiate change from the inside out.
You can find this book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, and Indigo.
With all the ways that mindfulness has changed and improved my life, I’ve wanted to write a book that helps others begin their own practice and head out on their own journeys.
In The Joy of Now Journal: Mindfulness in Five Minutes a Day there are quotes and prompts that will get you thinking in more mindful ways. You can spend five minutes each day seeing your world and all its splendor in a new light.
The book is beautifully and colorfully illustrated by Katie Jennings Campbell.
Here’s the introduction:
Do more. Be more. Accumulate more. That’s the mistaken path we often try to take toward happiness. But pure joy is right here, right now, waiting for you through the practice of mindfulness.
What is mindfulness? It’s simply slowing down enough to notice, without judgment, all the little things inside and around you that are occurring in the present moment. And it can be practiced by anyone, at any time, to help you live life to the fullest.
The Joy of Now is your guide along your journey into mindfulness. With inspiration and simple exercises on every page, you’ll awaken to opportunities for joy in every moment of your day – body, mind, spirit, relationships, finances, and career. All it takes is five minutes each day for change that can last a lifetime.
You can find this book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, and Indigo.
Visit my Recommended Resources page where I post the latest list of books, programs, and products that I’ve found to be particularly helpful in growing your mindfulness and meditation practices.
Infographic created with Visme
Create the life you want: Combine the law of attraction with mindfulness
The law of attraction suggests that our positive or negative thoughts bring about positive or negative experiences. My latest book, The Mindful Guide to Law of Attraction, pairs that belief with the powerful practices of mindfulness. Through intentional breathing, writing, and engaging, you’ll hone a method for manifesting health, wealth, and love―the elements of happiness.
Let the law of attraction work for you by adopting its basic steps of identifying and visualizing the things you desire. Then use 45 practical meditation techniques included in the book to achieve awareness. By concentrating your positive energy on obtaining your wants, you’ll give yourself permission to receive them.
To your happiness! ~Paige
You can find this book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, and Indigo.
The Mindful Living Guide
I just love that infographic! I have bookmarked this for a family member as I can’t seem to find articles that approach mindfulness is such an accessible manner. Even in the major publications like there seems to be some angle that doesn’t sit right. You hit it right for me with this one–thanks!
Meditation is the best Mindfulness Practice. Thanks for sharing a great article.
Very informative article. Simple and helpful tips for meditation. Thanks for sharing. Guided meditation can also be a good way for beginners to still an active mind. Do checkout http://www.mantravibes.net for live guided meditation. It combines 2 of the most effective techniques, guided meditation and mantra chant, to bring a listener to a state of deep relaxation and stillness.
I am so IMPRESSED with how CLEARLY you explain mindfulness in this post. I try to tell everyone what mindfulness is and how mindfulness has helped me and this is exactly it! (If only my adult-ish kids would read it…HA!) I am so grateful that you were able to succinctly put into words what I have been experiencing since I’ve started practicing mindfulness – over the past 3 years. You can be sure that I will be sharing your website and resources with others. I look forward to reading more and staying in touch! : )
Thank you so much Lisa! That’s why I called this site Simple Mindfulness – I try to break down difficult concepts into simple steps that just about anyone can follow. Thank you for sharing and many blessings to you on your mindful journey!!
I agree with the idea of mindfulness, that it means being present. Because if you are not present you cannot possibly be making conscious choices. it is true that we a;ll get caught up in busyness and stress. I like your idea of reiterating the fact that you cannot change a habit unless you understand the triggers that set these habitual responses off. Your initial statement about acceptance of what is, is hard to do for most people, because they are locked in fear, doubt, judgement and so on.
I would like to add that being present is the goal of any or all personal growth and self improvement programs. However, when you add a condition such as “without judgment”, this limits the prospect of people to instigate the practice of mindfulness. Pretty much everyone is judgmental. We as a society are always comparing ourselves with others and making judgments about self and others. So, for me, I would take out this pre-cursor to achieving mindfulness, because the actual event of doing so, is already a difficult process.
Mindfulness means being present without judgment. You can’t have one without the other and still call it mindfulness. Yes, it’s incredibly difficult to stop the judging, and the point isn’t to completely stop judging. As with meditation, the point is to notice the judging thoughts from an objective perspective (“Oh, look how I just judged that person.”), notice their effects then make a more conscious choice in similar situations going forward.
Mindfulness helps you to slow down the process, realize that you are not your thoughts and feelings, allow for a brief pause so that you don’t just repeat the same patterns. It gives you the opportunity to make different choices.
Just as the point of meditation is not to completely clear your mind (which is impossible for more than a second or two), the point of mindfulness isn’t to stop all judging. They are both tools to help you objectively observe your thoughts and emotions, consider if they’re helping, and make different choices if necessary.
Its informative article thanks.
“Mindfulness is the practice of noticing. You can do it anytime, anywhere.” Really inspired by this post. Will start my practice soon. Thanks for sharing!
I love everything about self care but the same way my mind is jumping in many directions all the time for that I started to use http://bit.ly/2JmU2cG as a complimentary with your resources and recommendations I hope can make me successful in my goals,..Thank you
Wow! What a great guide on mindfulness practice. Especially, Graphical part was amazing! Really enjoyed.
I push mindfulness alongside traditional treatments when dealing with attention deficit disorders.
i like youur article.
Thanks so much Meenakshi!
Being “mindful” is what I lack many times. Instead my mind wanders and I need to put concentrated efforts to push back to the present. It is said the best things in life are free …. I would love to have this practical tratise on the subject to help me realize my potential and live stress free.
Sampath,
I think it’s impossible for anyone to stay completely in the present (unless you’re a dog or a deer). The minds of humans naturally wander so we practice meditation and mindfulness to train the mind to do otherwise. Like any other practice, the more you do it, the easier it becomes (although we all have our days where anything is a challenge 🙂 ).
I’ve discovered that gratitude and acceptance are keys to living a happier life with less stress.
Aprender a estar aquí y ahora es difícil en tiempos de tanta aceleración, me parece maravilloso poder contar con una guía de fácil aplicación. Te felicito por contribuir a hacer del mundo un lugar más apacible.
Juana,
I confess that I had to send your comment through an online interpreter (interpretation:
Learning to be here and now is difficult in times of such acceleration, I think it’s wonderful to have an easy-to-use guide. I congratulate you for contributing to making the world a more peaceful place.)
Thank you so much for this! It’s my goal to share all that I’ve learned to help others live happier lives.
I would love to win this book/journal
Sounds wonderful. Things we all need to learn in this day and age…mndfulness
I have never really learned how to pause
that is one goal I am working on
Have not been successful in all these years
Beverly,
You might want to check out the article I’ve linked below, Embrace the Power of the Pause, which was written by Courtney Carver. Her new book, Soulful Simplicity, covers the power of the pause more extensively. I also have an app on my phone called Chill that sends me little reminders throughout my day for ways to pause and take a deep breath. Like any new habit, it’s challenging to incorporate into your life at first, but, with practice and time, it works its magic on you.
Mindfulness is a new consideration to current times, something that wasn’t considered when I was younger unless you did yoga. Would love to read your book. Kind regards from Australia.
Thank you, Colleen! I agree with you. We didn’t even have yoga when I was growing up.
I am VERY excited!!!!!! Your book sounds like just what I have been looking for but cannot find anywhere. I would LOVE to win a copy of it- I think it would be very beneficial to me and my daughter.
Thanks so much Sherry! The Joy of Now can definitely benefit anyone at any age.
At the moment I’m a little obsessed with things along the lines of mindfulness, gratitude & trying to find true happiness. I found myself getting frustrated and angry more than I wanted to so finding inspiration in Ted Talks (I love Ted talks!!!), books, articles in the newspaper and online is helping enormously. This would be the perfect book to read and to have on the shelf for the moments I feel like I need to dip into it.
Wishing you much success with the book, thanks so much for this fantastic giveaway. x
Thank you, Sara! So often, that frustration and anger comes from consciously or subconsciously setting up expectations for the ways we think things should go, and they don’t go that way. Losing the expectations and accepting whatever happens are key to happiness and less stress. It’s not always easy, especially at first. Using mindfulness to notice when you’ve created an expectation and giving yourself the opportunity to drop it is a practice.
In reality, there’s precious little we can control, and expecting the world to operate under our expectations (although we all do it on a regular basis) isn’t very realistic. How often do we consider whether we ourselves are operating under the expectations of everyone around us? It’s kind of impossible to do. Someone’s expectations won’t be met and that’s their issue, not yours. It’s no one’s job to make everyone around them happy.
So glad you’re finding so many helpful resources all around you!
I am trying to find peace and contentment in my life, to not judge others and not hold up anyone else’s yardstick to my life. To do this I am working on clearing the noise from my head and looking within. Working on unlearning the bad habits acquired over a lifetime is proving to be a bit harder then I anticipated. But I keep working at it and looking for insight and assistance where ever i can find it.
Kat, you’re definitely on the right path. Unlearning old habits takes time. It’s a daily practice where some days are better than others. Be kind to yourself along the way.
I teach mindfulness in my work but have also been working on incorporating it in my life. For me, I’ve learned that mindfulness is making it a daily practice of being more intentional of letting go of what I cannot change/have no control over.
That’s awesome that you’re teaching mindfulness, Eileen! The best way to learn something is to teach it. Yes, it’s a definitely a daily practice which varies a bit each day. Acceptance of what is without trying to change it is critical to happiness. That doesn’t mean being a doormat. We can take actions to create a better world for ourselves and others, accepting whatever outcome occurs, adjusting our future actions based on experienced results. Setting expectations of outcomes almost always leads to undesirable feelings.
Is ‘Mindfulness” the new buzz word for normal social behavior and applying the tools that rishi’s have taught us all along.
I would argue that “normal social behavior” is subject to interpretation and a high level of variability. I’m not familiar with Rishi’s teachings, but I’m guessing that mindfulness is generally what is being taught.
The rise in mindfulness teachings and awareness is an indication of the high level of mindlessness in which most people live and which has become their norm.
We can all be taught something. It’s our responsibility to choose to implement what we’re taught in our lives.
Over the last six months we have started to introduce the concept of mindfulness in our everyday workplace. It’s truly a slow process. In our workplace, “mindfulness” – the next step beyond “situational awareness” – this could very well mean the difference between getting hurt or going home safe at the end of each day. Your book can assist in bringing and sharing mindfulness to a whole new level here. Many thanks for your sharing!
Tessa,
It’s great that you see how mindfulness can tangibly benefit you and your coworkers. And, yes, my book can show how it can be applied in every aspect of life. Thanks for your comment!
I am a Social Worker working in a government rehabilitation unit and am keen to learn more about mindfulness to assist my clients but there never seems to be enough funding to purchase the necessary resources or do the training. I am looking for an approach to mindfulness that is easy to teach and easy for clients to understand and this book sounds like it would get me well on the way to being able to better assist my clients with becoming mindful.
Sam,
There are many free online resources that teach mindfulness. One I’ve tried that brings you through the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction course created years ago by Jon Kabat-Zin who started the mindfulness movement in America decades ago is https://palousemindfulness.com/
Mindfulness is one of those “simple but not always easy” practices. While things like CBT and DBT have turned mindfulness into specific clinical practices, the benefits can be accessed with simple daily practices like meditation or taking time each day to notice what’s great in your life.
Great. Thank-you for that. I shall look them up.
i’m having a very hard time at the moment with stress & things i have no control over at the moment. i’m always looking for new books to read, so i would love to win this giveaway!
Kelli,
We can’t control anything but our own responses. To try to do otherwise creates tons of stress. While you can take actions to move things in a certain way, the stress comes from things/people not behaving as you wished. I’ve found it to be a rule that expectations are the source of so many negative emotions and stress. If you can accept whatever outcome occurs, and decide on how you’ll act from there, life gets much easier.
Ever since I resigned from my job in September, I always wondered what I was going to do next. I saw your information on LinkedIn and thought it would not hurt to check this out. To be honest I am just now getting to read the emails and I love it! You are an inspiration to not give up. There are more important things out there beginning with myself! Thank you so much Paige! You continue to inspire me even outside of the workplace! 🙂 I look forward to reading more everyday.
So awesome to see you here Dawn! Wondered what happened with you. I’ve written quite a bit about what I’ve learned with all the twists and turns that my life has taken. I hope you’ll find something here that helps you in your journey. Thanks so much!!
Your writing is very inspirational and appreciated. I have started practicing meditation, which I find challenging, but I know will be worth continuing. Your book looks beautiful!
Thank you, Susan! Yes, meditation can be challenging at first. Start small and allow your practice to grow. Just five minutes a day, practiced daily can create powerful changes.
I believe that utilizing mindfulness as a daily practice could be beneficial for me as I continue to heal from depression and PTSD after a long-term physically and emotionally abusive marriage. Although I’ve been divorced for almost 3 years, I’m still struggling with setting & meeting goals related to education for certification and finances. I believe with consistent mindfulness I could make better choices and meet goals
Yes, Erin, mindfulness can definitely help you in your healing process. Many times, there are subconscious beliefs and mindsets that allow abusive relationships to escalate for far too long. It takes a while to go deep, discover what those beliefs and mindsets are and – hardest of all – change them. Be compassionate with yourself. You’re on a journey that will twist and turn. Mindfulness can help you return to the present moment, pause and take responsibility for your choice in the next moment.
As someone who is always “right”, and tending toward getting others to see it my way, I think I need to slow down, take a look at myself, and start opening my mind to seeing others’ point of view. Maybe this book would help me with that.
As a “finder of lost things”, I don’t usually take the time to find myself within the whirligig of life, as it is today… Less staff to do more, and everyone wants something “now”.
As the old saying goes: Would you rather be right or happy? And how important is it to be right? For what reasons? Examining your answers to these questions can be enlightening, Lyn. It’s great that you see the opportunities in being open to others’ perspectives.
As for the “whirligig of life,” I, too, struggle with busyness. The more I challenge my own perceptions of what’s most important (i.e. “There’s not enough time to meditate.” vs. “It’s always possible to make time to meditate because I know I’ll feel better.”), I find that taking the time to slow down and take care of myself is always the best choice for all.
Happy Birthday Paige and congratulations on the publication of your book. How wonderful. Thank you too for all of your work on your blog – lots of helpful insights. I am 62 and still struggling with acceptance but am grateful every day to know that I can change. Gratitude has been my saviour. Have fun with all the fun that will come with your book! Yeah, and thanks again, Deborah
Thanks so much Deborah! Acceptance can be a challenge, but my husband and I wouldn’t still be married without it. It makes all aspects of life much easier. Every day is an opportunity to change at any age.
“Mindfulness is noticing”. Perhaps many of us spend too much time noticing the wrong thing. I know in my case this is fact. I’ve got one of those brains that is constantly seeing everything in my peripheral vision yet at times ignores what is right in front of me. Perhaps your book would assist in my area of lacking, focus. I must adimt, I love the color scheme of the cover! Caught my eye immediately… Congratulations on your book being published!
Thank you Michael! Yes, The Joy of Now Journal can help you to focus on what’s in front of you. Change comes from daily practice. Notice that you’re not noticing what’s in front of you, adjust your focus and maintain it as long as you can, even if that’s only for a few seconds. The more you practice this each day, the more you’ll be able to focus on what’s in front of you.
The explanation of mindfulness is so easy but yet to be able to conquer it is not easy at all. I believe it all starts with a breath. And this is where my every day journey of mindfulness has started. I was in the midst of chaos in my everyday life and suddenly I could not find my way out anymore. I felt like the whole world is crushing on me and suddenly a secret voice started to guide me through breathing. It felt like heaven, I did not hear anything but my heartbeat and breathing. And then my journey began: I googled for the mindfulness apps, installed one on my phone and from that moment on I started with mindfulness practice every day. It is almost a year now but there is still so much to discover and to learn. And I cannot do without it anymore, I became sort of addicted to it. It helped me a lot to get through some of very unpleasant medical examinations, it helps me at work on a daily basis, and it helps me when doing sports in fact it helps me with everything. I am happy and grateful that mindfulness came into my life and made it easier to go by. And in other to be able to spread the word about mindfulness it would be great getting your book. And last but not least happy 50th anniversary. xoxo, Tanja
Thank you, Tanya! It’s so wonderful how you’re infusing all aspects of your life with mindfulness and realizing its benefits! It’s a journey and learning process that lasts a lifetime. And, yes, it begins with focusing on your breath. Simple but not always easy – returning to the breath over and over.
Paige Congrats on the release of your new book! So exciting!! I would love to review it….pls email me.
And believe me….this is a beautiful and loving way to reconnect with your highest self for sure. God knows we all need to do that.
xoxo, Z~
My beautiful Zeenat,
Thank you so much! I would definitely appreciate a review of my book on Amazon. Yes, we all need to spend a bit more time each day reflecting and reconnecting with our True Selves. Big hugs!!!
Mindfulness is essential for life! The present is aptly named for it is a gift from God.
Couldn’t agree with you more, Maura! As we approached the end of the year, my kids said things like, “This year is almost over and will never return again.” I reminded them that this moment will soon be gone, never to return again. And the same for every moment and every day. A gratitude practice can help to remind us of the little wonders that we experience each day.
I really need a daily mindfulness practice. A daily meditation time. Time to get grounded and battle the demons that take over my mind. (anxiety and depression) I need a reason to sit and reflect. Time to slow down. Maybe journaling would be a logical next step. Beautiful book cover! I feel motivated to begin…
Thank you, Lisa! Your motivation to begin can be your motivation to sit and reflect each day. Your motivation – your ‘why’ – is critical in setting up any new habit or practice. When things get tough or busy, that ‘why’ will bring you back to your practice.
Being new to the practice, start with one minute. It sounds like one minute wouldn’t be worth it. Trust me, this method works. Sit for one minute and don’t judge yourself when your mind spins during the entire minute (because it will, no matter how hard you try to control it). After a few days, build to two or three minutes. Take your time. Practice at different times of the day to see what works best for you. I have an intention to meditate once a day. I don’t dictate the time or for how long because those rules tend to add stress to the process. The time varies every day and the length varies from five to twenty minutes, depending on how my day is going. Something is always better than nothing.
Good morning lovely your new book looks amazing. I am new to mindfulness and find it hard to incorporate into my daily life. Mindfulness has helped me with depression and anxiety but yet I start and stop and don’t continue. I have started doing some mindfulness with my son and it is really helping him. So I need to keep going. Would love to win your book. Thank you for giving me the chance to enter. Have a happy day.
Thanks so much Tanya! Like any new habit, it takes time to fully incorporate mindfulness into your life in ways that work for you. Often, mindfulness can simply mean noticing things that previously went by in a blur. Mindfulness apps (I use Chill) that remind you to be in the moment and breathe can help to develop more mindfulness throughout your day. Love that you’re teaching your son this practice!
Hugs and love, Paige! So excited to see your new book! (I saw your post on Medium and commented there)
We all desperately need to slow down, take stock, and focus on what makes us happy. I practice mindfulness, but recently, life has been somewhat shaken up with health issues and all the running around makes it tough to stay on track. We are still not done with the hospital visits as it is a long-term treatment, and I’d really love to win your book to help me achieve this. I cannot think of a better way to do this than via your book, my dear birthday twin!
It seems that you’re the epitome of mindfulness – the way you take so many photos of the ‘everyday’ things that most people miss and notice so many wonderful things about them. I’m sending you lots of warm, healing energy to support you and your family through the treatments. Hugs!!!
Beautiful looking book Paige. Congratulations for producing something so spectacular. I’ve learned over the years to simply be present with whatever I’m doing. Baking, reading, writing, meditating…whatever it is…just being there allows me to understand with more clarity that I am not my mind. Which always wants to be busy. 🙂
Thank you, Elle! I couldn’t agree with you more. Mindfulness has been wonderful for my generally Type A personality. Single-tasking has helped me to slow down, be more present and feel less stressed. The stress creeps in when my mind wanders to the future and all that’s left on my to-do list. When I notice that and bring myself back to the present and what I’m working on, my stress level immediately drops along with the little niggling aches and pains that accumulate in my body when I’m stressed.
I am a clinician at a community health center and I teach mindfulness practices to my patients. I find the the more simplistic practices are often the most effective because they get utilized the most.I am always looking for new tools to enhance the lives of my patients, as well as my own. I practice mindfulness daily and find that it has helped me become more attuned to my patients. I would love to have your book to utilize and share with the patients that work with.
That’s awesome that you’re teaching mindfulness to your patients! The clinicians and directors that I work with at our community mental health center share your sentiments. We’ve done extensive training with our staff to teach them CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) to help clients with a variety of diagnoses. Being more mindful, more present, in any clinical setting is always helpful as it helps the clinician to focus on the client and helps the client to feel heard.
Being mindful is a virtue. Everyone should strive to be mindful of his/her family members, coworkers, acquaintances etc,so as to live in happiness and harmony with the surroundings. However, there are always conflicting reasons and circumstances that prevent one from carrying out his plan/resolve to be mindful, something standing between his personal interest and social responsibilities, for example. Being aware of these things, I wonder if there is anything special or unusual in your book that I am not aware of?
While being mindful supports a happier life, no one is perfect. We all lapse. I love that mindfulness creates a supportive way to handle this: Notice that you lapsed, don’t judge yourself, and remember to pause the next time a circumstance arises that caused you to not act mindfully. Every day, do your best because that’s the best you can do. Your best will vary every day.
If things are preventing you from being mindful, examine how you’re allowing those things to come into your life. Examine your beliefs that tell you that being mindful isn’t possible. Experiment with different responses. These experiments can challenge and change your beliefs.
I have been observing some young children taking part in a mindfulness activity, and I’m fairly certain that it will be beneficial to my volunteer work both with children and in social programs.
I will say that it seems to meld quite well with my inherent philosophy, but since my own practice is elf-developed, I’d like to see how others approach the concept.
Alfred,
There are as many approaches as there are people practicing. One size does not fit all. There are more formalized programs like MBSR (mindfulness-based stress reduction) and CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) for those who like to follow certain steps. Books by Jon Kabat-Zin (who invented MBSR) and Thich Nhat Hanh are also quite helpful for those finding their own way.
I am new at Mindfulness and have found what I have learned so very helpful. I would be so grateful to win one of your books to continue my search of knowledge.
Thank you for being here, Steffi! I appreciate you adding Simple Mindfulness to your mindfulness resources!
Hi Paige,
I would like to add your book to my library of mindfulness readings, sometimes I do get caught and give up my practice, so a journal that grounds me in 5 minutes would be of benefit to return to the path.
I also facillitate a group for women with intractable anxiety and I believe this would support them when anxiety is at it’s peak.
Thanks for your generosity
Yes, Kerrie, mindfulness can definitely help those with anxiety. Therapies like CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) have formalized mindfulness into a system that helps so many with depression and anxiety.
This looks gorgeous, Paige. Congratulations. I like the way you make mindfulness so user friendly. It has changed my life radically too.
Thank you, Sandra! Yes, it can be a very powerful practice.
Such a good explanation of mindfulness., Paige. I find many descriptions and philosophies try to make it too involved and complicated and promise too much. It doesn’t have to be. I love this paragraph:
“Mindfulness isn’t like a lightbulb that you suddenly turn on and your life changes. It’s a daily practice, like gratitude, that doesn’t seem to do much at first. But, if you stick with it on a regular basis, you’ll realize one day how far you’ve come, how much your life has changed for the better.”
Congratulations on the book! I love the cover. <3
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Thanks so much, Debbie! I try to keep things simple and real around here. 🙂 If you repeat something small over and over, you’ll end up with a huge effect – just like the Grand Canyon.
Congrats on your book, Paige! Mindfulness can be so helpful in our lives to keep us focused on today rather than our regrets from the past or worrying about the future. I love the idea of mindfulness in five minutes a day. That is doable for anyone.
Thank you, Cathy! Focusing on the present moment can help to alieve anxiety and depression which can only exist when we’re dwelling on the past or the future.
I am 62 will retire in 4 more years, I have always planned everyday and every week. I have never been able not to think of the moment do to having to control so many things at one time. I have never truly learn to relax always on edge. Would be very nice for me as a gift to my wife of 42 years to be able to live in the moment and be kind and joyful. I don’t want to be a grumpy senior I want to share my experiences and help younger people see that there is more to life than chasing money and possessions. I have learned now that I have given away the best of myself to the wrong things in life now I have to start new for what matters myself and family.
It’s never too late to change, Calvin. I used to be the ultimate planner as well. I had a fun and very powerful learning experience that changed this in me about 20 years ago. I went to Costa Rica with a friend with a plan to stay for about a month. She’s a free spirit while I was the consummate planner. The first couple days of the trip, I sat next to the pool with my Lonely Planet Guide to Costa Rica, planning out all the details of our trip while she ventured out, meeting new people and having fun with no plans. She ended up meeting just the right people to make my plans come to life better than I could have imagined. The trip taught me to go with the flow more often because the Universe has a much better plan for me than I could put together.
Ultimately, you can only control yourself, your thoughts, and your reactions. There’s no need to control everything else. It’s exhausting and takes the fun out of life. My husband and I, in our early years of marriage, “controlled” each other right into a divorce. Once we learned how to accept each other as we are and stop trying to control, we re-married and have had a much happier marriage.
Mindfulness can help you pause and notice if you’re choosing control or being present at any time. That pause gives you the opportunity to make a different choice instead of repeating old patterns.
I first learned of this practice approximately 6 mos ago when I was attending a profession development seminar. The school provided its teaching staff with tools to help us deal with stress. My facilitator is a professional counselor and has had years of experience in this area. I explained to her that, for 25 years, I have been battling the issue of depression. I was diagnosed with clinical depression 25 years ago. I have been blessed to have been hospitalized only once. I expressed to the facilitator the need for doctors to also prescribe to patients who are medicated for emotional problems to go through Mindfulness Therapy. This sought of therapy could be beneficial in reducing hospital stays as well as setbacks. I am currently with a therapist that utilizes this technique, along with another, with me. It does help. Reliance on medication is not the answer.
I completely agree with you Barbara! I work at a large community behavioral health center and have been so happy to see a variety of mindfulness techniques included in the many trainings offered to our clinical staff. The staff also attest to its effectiveness. In many cases, these types of treatments are more effective and long-lasting than medications.
CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) is growing quickly due to its speed and effectiveness. When I did a little research to figure out what it is, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that it’s a methodology for mindfulness.
My gratitude and mindfulness practices have helped me to transform my old moderate depression to consistent happiness. It takes time and many baby steps, but it works!
It’s a sad sorry world. I’m not asking for this book just for me. I wish to learn and understand how to practice daily joyfulness, so that I may give it out to others who are in need it.
CJ – One way to practice daily joyfulness may be to change your perspective. Instead of assuming that it’s a “sad, sorry world,” begin to question that belief. Our minds tend to find what they’re looking for. Instead of looking for reinforcement of an ingrained belief, actively look for its opposite. Start committing daily random acts of kindness and see how that changes your perspective.
In the journey of choosing and pursuing one’s goals, every individual charts her or his own way. For me, cognitive techniques, including mindfulness, are the most effective and rewarding tools in my pursuit of understanding myself and the world. However, the parts of my mind and personality that respond best to these approaches are also the biggest saboteurs of attention, progress and hope.
I find I maintain focus and perspective best, and feel and perform best with a bit of guidance, whether it be from a book, a blog, a journal, a trusted friend or a therapist. When I stay “on track,” I am a stronger partner for my spouse, and a better role model for my four-year-old son. Your new book seems to be an ideal tool for maintaining direction, focus and attitude, and I would cherish the opportunity to experience how it could help me create the map for my personal journey.
Scott, it’s wonderful that you understand the tools that can best support you! Using those tools to create daily habits can help to “automate” them so they become the stepping stones for further growth.
This is a great article. I would like to learn more about the practice of mindfulness, as I am at a turning point where I need to re-evaluate the way I am leading my life.
Thanks Steve! I’ve got plenty of articles that can help you see things in a new light, re-think beliefs, question societal thinking and figure out what’s right for you. Understanding your core values is a great starting point.
I am new to mindfulness and have been reading everything I can to learn about it. Would love to win! Thanks for opportunity! Love your website!
Thanks so much Shawna! Welcome to your mindfulness journey!
Mindfulness for me is about living in the now. It is about being present in this moment, taking a breath, and realizing that you are where you need to be… right now. It is being happy, joyful, grateful… Yet, more often than not, uncomfortable and just allowing that uneasiness just be. If this book can, in any way help me to continue my practices in a meaningful and deeper way, then I would be blessed to have a (SIGNED!!) copy of it to guide me through the next phase of my journey.
My goal is to be less reactionary and more mindful in my daily life. I have ADHD which doesn’t like my mindfulness training… And that struggle of default impulsive reactionary behavior doesn’t serve me moment by moment. It creates overwhelm and anxiety… It also engages (enrages?) my fight, flight or freeze brain and overrides my mindfulness and my breathing. So I am always searching for wonderful and authentic resources to help me put what I learn from meditation, into practice. (I also get to give myself a HUGE pat on the back when I break free from my patterns and implement mindfulness in a sticky situation. This is also something I could not do before starting this work… I would never give myself any credit for any moment of mindfulness I was able to bring to the moment.) I have difficulty journaling and sticking to it. I also have difficulty in not defaulting to pessimism, and even *saying* negative things out loud. I want to be able to develop gratitude. I don’t know how to stick to journaling and writing gratitude lists.
I want to continue to build my mindfulness toolbelt, and to continue my growth on a daily basis.
Thank you Paige for your newsletter and insightful, clear and “simple” articles. Many blessings
Wow! Thanks so much Cassie! It sounds like you’ve made huge strides on your mindfulness journey. No one is perfect and mindful all the time. We all have lapses. Just like in meditation, no one can control the presence of their thoughts all the time. Mindfulness helps us notice when we lapse, not judge when we do, and compassionately remember to be mindful going forward.
I love that you reward yourself when you’re mindful! That’s so important!
Regarding journaling, it’s not for everyone. And even for those who journal, it may not work in every phase of life. Before I had kids, I could write pages of things I was grateful for. When the needs of babies and toddlers took all my time, I had no time to write a gratitude list. Instead, I would mindfully notice people, things, occurrences, anything throughout my day and say a little “thank you” to whatever it was. Sometimes, at the end of the day, I would reflect on what went well and what I was grateful for. The more I noticed in the moment, the more I realized I was noticing throughout my day. Today, I take about five minutes every day to write what I’m grateful for in my daily planner. My practice has evolved to adapt to my lifestyle. There’s no one (or ten) right ways to do it.
Thanks Paige! Your words are a reminder for me to make sure that I don’t think about the “prescription” for my practice as a “1 size fits all” but is a “size that fits me right now” 🙂 It’s hard to not want – or to expect – to do the “the perfect practice”. It’s almost similar to when you first start out and things are amazing, as if waking up for the first time… And then that “WOW this is amazing and I feel so enlightened” the initial feeling of euphoria goes away with time, because we start to really dig in and allow our practices to take root and try to practice in the moment. That’s when it gets hard! That’s when the ego says ” hmmm maybe I can miss my sit today” (and says this for maybe a few days in a row) and then *wham* life kicks your butt and you realize that, when you “slip” things aren’t going as well; and my life and mind doesn’t feel balanced… If that makes sense!
My grandma recently died (as in 2 days ago recently) and I live in the USA, my family are all in Australia, and that *wham* of life hit me hard. I haven’t practiced in about 3 days, and when I do, I’m totally unable to focus – and I kind of don’t want to practice. Because it hurts.I am sad. I am grieving and it’s hard. Even writing this is hard.. But I know deep down, to cut myself some slack, and try to give myself and my feelings all the kindness and space I can muster. (And tell the critical judge to [insert swearing here!] and zip it!)
In reality, this is probably the hardest thing for me to do. I am trying to just breathe, and let my emotional ocean ebb and flow as it needs to.
Just writing this made me realize the amount of gratitude I have for SO MANY THINGS – of course having my grandma for so long and everything about her is constantly on my mind, but I am grateful that I had the guts to even put this out there! That’s big… What’s even bigger? Knowing my meditation and the work I have done is letting me see that, is comforting.
Thanks Paige, for the space to write this 🙂 yet another item for my gratitude list for today… <3
You’re quite welcome, Cassie! My heart goes out to you. Be compassionate, as you are, and allow whatever comes up to be and pass. Like the clouds in the sky, sometimes it’s just a little cloudy and other times they bring big storms. In either case, they pass.
I certainly have days where I get to the end of the day and realize I haven’t yet meditated. I used to think it was too late, I was too busy and didn’t have time for it. I’m currently using the Insight Timer app with tracks how many days in a row you’ve practiced (and it has a beautiful timer with lovely sounds). It makes me not want to “break the chain.” Now, when it’s the end of the day, I haven’t meditated and there’s still plenty of work to do, I take 10-15 minutes and meditate anyway. I always feel so much better and am better able to keep going in a relaxed manner.
The ego, monkey mind, brain isn’t very good at making decisions for us. Our hearts always know what’s best.
I have spent my life in a rush, trying to do everything and please everyone in the process. I am changing that way of life, slowing down and being in the moment. I am actively trying to be mindful of the present, no rush. I loved this post because it just seemed to reach out and touch my very soul. It describes the very process that I am trying to learn and incorporate into my life. I’m entering a new stage in my life and it is going to be amazing. I’m only responsible for my actions, thoughts and progress. I’m learning that I have no control over others choices. I loved this post and want to own this book!
Thanks so much Connie! Yes, it definitely sounds like you’re stepping into your own. Mindfulness can be so helpful in this process. Remember to be gentle and compassionate with yourself along the way. Some days go well and others not so well. Do your best knowing that’s the best you can do. Your best will vary each day.
I would enjoy reading and learning how to slow down and other let life pass e by. I’m a buy mom of 3, wok 2 jobs and go to school full time working on my Bachelors in Social Work. Very busy…but…would enjoy taking time to enjoy life with my children and family.
Boy, you are busy Cathy! And kudos to you for working and going to school at the same time! Mindfulness has taught me the importance of being present with my kids, regardless of how busy I am. While it was difficult at first, whenever one of my kids needs me, no matter what I’m doing, I stop and focus on their needs, looking at them directly into their eyes so they know I’m there for them. While it seems that this would create a ton of distraction, it actually minimizes distractions and lowers my stress because I’m taking care of their needs in the moment without them nagging me and without me trying to juggle thoughts of what I’m working on and thoughts of needing to tend to them.
Mindfulness explained in this way is so much easier for people to understand. I do use mindfulness, but not as a journal practice; t’s a fantastic idea to get me to start. Mindfulness is also good in helping people calm anxieties by acknowledging what is around them. I especially love what you said about noticing things in a non-judgmental way. It’s so easy for us to put labels on things, good or bad, as you said, but much more difficult to NOT label things.
Thanks, Marie! Another way to look at labeling is to say that we’re storytellers or maker-uppers. Notice how you subconsciously start making up a story about another person, especially a stranger, when you look at them. It’s hard not to. We also make up stories about almost everything that happens to us. A way of being mindful could be to objectively look at the story you’re making up to see what you can learn about yourself.
Loved this post and look forward to reading! I am new on this journey and need to stop, pause and be present! I an focused this year and presence, patience and pause….
It’s easy to forget to pause and be present. There are tons of apps out there that can help with this. I use Chill to remind me to be present throughout the day. Wearing a ring on a finger you’re not used to or snapping a rubber band that’s on your wrist are no-tech ways of reminding yourself.
This article is very interesting. I am always so caught up with the moment and looking for ways to slow down and enjoy life
Thanks Barb! Sometimes the easiest way to slow down and enjoy life is to simply close your eyes, take a few deep breaths then look out the window for a few minutes. That’s the beauty of mindfulness.
Reading through above, one sentence caught my attention ”Mindfulness is the practice of noticing. You can do it anytime, anywhere.” It sounds simple, but the question is how to implement it. This is what I am looking for. Human beings tend to complicate simple things and searching for answer in a think books. I am looking for a practical guide. Being in now is something not easy to achieve as thoughts are jumping to the past and to the future. I want to learn to keep thought in now and enjoy that simple moment and seize on current opportunities.
Birute,
It’s no more complicated than that – stop and notice what’s in front of you or how your body feels or the thoughts running through your head. Mindfulness isn’t about controlling your mind. It’s simply noticing what’s going on. Over time, when noticing becomes a habit, it will be easier to be in the moment. Unless you’re super-human (or an older Buddhist monk who has meditated their whole life), you’re always going to have thoughts running through your head. It’s normal to only have a few moments when things seem to stop because your attention is completely wrapped up in the thing you’re noticing (like a beautiful sunset).
Mindfulness, like meditation, isn’t complicated. The magic of both is making them a daily practice, being gentle with yourself as you do this, and allow their magic to unfold slowly. Neither are magic pills. They take time.
You might want to check out books by Jon Kabat-Zin and Thich Nhat Hanh who are the masters of mindfulness.
Paige- love this and congrats on your book/ journal- I love special journals like this that encourage and empower you to write daily.
i think my daily journaling is so empowering and embraces change with flow Thank for sharing you wisdom xxoo
Thanks so much Suzie! I agree that a little daily journaling, like any daily practice, can be quite powerful.
This is a great article that addresses the difficulties I have with my own mindfulness practices daily… While I can often be comfortable with discomfort in the moment, I don’t often stick with things like morning meditations, despite a desire to do so!
Creating discomfort for yourself by judging yourself as “good” or “bad” because you didn’t stick with a practice is a very common way people fall out of mindfulness. I’ve learned not to beat myself up because I missed a daily practice. I’m now much more flexible about how, when and for how long I do things like meditate or do yoga. Can’t do 30 minutes in the morning? Ten minutes later in the afternoon is just fine. And, instead of thinking about whether or not I get a practice done, I focus on how good I’ll feel after I do it. That tends to be a better motivator.
Thanks so much for your comment and connecting TJ!
Mindfulness has always fascinate me, I was trying it from last 2 years by never had any experience, now i can understand that it was due to my lack of knowledge of this practice. I read your article on first reading it was same as all other articles but as I read it more and more every thing was changing. If you belief it or not I read this article 7 times, I never find such a detail explanation on mindfulness. I really thank you !!